Ferrets playing inside a box of packing
me: hi, can i have a large—
starbucks employee: you mean a venti?
me: can we not do this
wake up open the curtains
take a shower then dry my hair
come down stairs ready for breakfast
greet the mailman
if i worked at a sperm bank, every time some guy walked in i’d say things like get a load of this guy
"he’s the murderer" the cop on tv says
"no it isn’t," i say, "we’ve still got twenty minutes left"
things im good at
- petting dogs
- rolling my eyes
- ¿ that’s all.
Post so nice reblogged it twice
The wheels take impact and stress off your legs, and the position helps your spine, but you’re still doing running motions instead of biking motions, so your legs are getting a good workout, and you can go for longer
Kinda reminds me of that guy who made a cardboard Blue Falcon wrapped around a big tricycle.
When noone in group chat answers you
does anyone else feel kinda chubby sometimes when ur on the computer
so u just take ur shirt and
CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE HOW MUCH OF A MINDFUCK THAT WOULD BE TO A BABY THO
She sitting there like “my life has been a lie.”
If you’re dad
And HE’S dad…
WHO’S FLYING THE PLANE
"…Wait a goddamn minute here…"